Law News and Tips
A CHRISTMAS GIFT?
Vilbig © 2019
I recently heard from a client about an estate planning mess that could have been avoided.Although this particular story is hearsay, I know from experience that these kinds of things regularly happen.
Bill (these are not their real names) had been married to Julie for years.Together they raised three wonderful children.After the kids were grown, Julie got sick and died, leaving Bill a widower at a young age (relatively speaking).
After Julie’s death, Bill lived alone for several years, but that can be tough.Older singles get isolated. Most of their friends are married, so they can feel like the odd man out socially.So Bill became lonely.
After some time, Bill met Debra.Debra was a lovely lady.Her husband had also died after they had raised two children. Bill and Debra grew to love one another, and they decided to marry.The kids were actually happy to see their parents so happy.
Bill and Debra had a happy life together.They trusted each other completely.They bought a house together; they invested their money together; they had a joint bank account; and they named each other as their beneficiaries on their IRAs.
As time when on, Bill noticed that Debra was forgetting things.It was almost unnoticeable at first, but it grew progressively worse.Debra was finally diagnosed with dementia.Bill took care of her as best he could, but he himself was aging.The stress and strain proved too much, and Bill died. Since Bill and Debra had not done any planning, Debra’s kids had her declared incompetent, and opened up a conservatorship to manage her money and pay her bills.Debra did not survive Bill long, and she soon passed away.That’s when Bill’s kids had an unpleasant surprise.
On Bill’s death everything passed over to Debra, including Bill’s IRA.It wasn’t a malicious thing, but it just happened. So when Debra died, everything went to her children.Nothing was left for Bill’s kids.Debra’s kids could have shared, but they were disinclined.Bill’s kids were very upset, but there wasn’t anything that could be done.
This is just one of many examples of an unfortunate result from lack of good planning.I recently met with a young couple with a large family.Although they had thought about it, they had never gotten around to planning their estate.Now they were facing a medical emergency, so that need was immediate.
Although you can’t wrap it up in a nice box and put a pretty bow on it (or maybe you can), I would like to suggest a Christmas present for your family: a well thought out estate plan.It’s not a cool present, but it may be one of the more important things you can give them.Just a thought.Give me a call if you want to talk.
And at the risk of offending some, Merry Christmas and a blessed new year.
Fred Vilbig © 2019
It’s November again. How did that happen? Wasn’t Christmas just last month? It seems that up to a point, the older you get, the faster time goes. I think that’s because when you’re young, one day represents such a large portion of your life. When you get older, each day is just a miniscule fraction of your life, so they seem to fly by fast. It’s all relative. That is, up to a point. You have to stay active. Once you stop doing things, then time seems to really drag, but that’s a whole other story.
As I was saying, it’s November again, and the holidays are just around the corner. As I’ve mentioned before, Thanksgiving is my wife’s favorite holiday. Christmas has the frenzy of shopping, Easter has eggs, and the Fourth of July has fireworks with a possible trip to the ER. But Thanksgiving is about cooking a really good meal (something my wife enjoys and is really good at) and sitting around the table with family.
When we get the family together for meals, my wife and I tend to listen a lot. The kids talk all about things that they did when they were young, and we knowingly bob our heads as if we knew all about them all along. After they’re gone, we compare notes and have to admit to one another that we had no idea they did those things. How did they ever survive? But here they are, and we are actually grateful. Things aren’t perfect, but we’re still grateful.
But there is also a nostalgic, maybe even a sad, element to the holidays. I’m always reminded of the holidays when we were kids. We’d always end up at my grandparents’ house with my cousins. We actually spent a lot of time with her cousins. I thought everyone did, but I have since learned differently. We lived in Texas, so we played football in the backyard in shorts. Great fun. I’m really grateful for the time we had as a family when we were young.
But it also makes me sad. My grandparents, aunts and uncles, and even my parents have all passed away. My kids often do things, and I think how much my parents would’ve enjoyed sharing that with them.And we are not getting any younger either. For those of us who are baby boomers (I was apparently at the tail end), we have to admit that we have more aches and pains than we’ve ever had before. A sure sign of aging.
And with aging, we need to plan. It’s the prudent thing to do. We don’t want our kids’ memories of us to be clouded by the confusion and uncertainty of having to take care of us without any planning on our part.
This is strange territory for many people, but I’ve tried to make it easier to understand through my book, You Can’t Take It With You. To learn more about the topic, either go online or contact me to order a book. And then I’d love to sit and talk with you about planning to make it easier for your kids.