Law News and Tips
Fred Vilbig © 2019
Growing old is tough. Your body changes a lot, and you can’t do some of the things you used to do. Over time, you lose more and more of those abilities.You eventually get to the point where it is unsafe to drive. Giving up those keys – that source of independence – is really tough for most people, but after one or two accidents, we can be persuaded. Keeping house becomes a real chore. Eventually even cooking becomes too much. I’ve had a number of clients who we discovered were living on cereal and ice cream. Not the best of diets.
And then there are all of the health issues. America is kind of pill crazy. If something ails you, we have a pill for that. And that pill has side effects, so you need a pill for that. It’s like a never ending cycle. It seems that the older we get, the more we become like a chemistry experiment – a little of this and a little of that and we hope that the test tube doesn’t explode or catch on fire. And something as simple as knowing what pills to take when becomes a real challenge.
Most people try to stay in their homes for as long as they can. It’s familiar. There are no strangers around. We at least have a sense of independence.Sometimes people try to stay at home by bringing in a caregiver. That can be expensive, but so are nursing facilities. It’s a possibility, so people may want to explore it.
But in the end, the time comes when it’s time. It’s time to move into assisted living, if not even skilled nursing care. And that poses a whole new set of questions.
In my job, I’ve been to a lot of retirement homes and nursing facilities. To be honest with you, some are absolutely horrible. The smell, the lack of attention to the residents, and the attitude of the “caregivers” reminds me of scenes from Dante’s Inferno. But then other facilities are wonderful. The staff is caring and attentive, the food is good, and the place smells clean and even healthy.
So if you’re the person having to put mom or dad in some kind of facility, how are you to decide? First of all, what are you looking for and what questions should you even ask? When you visit the facility, you will certainly be given the grand tour, and the food will be fine. But there is an overabundance of facilities (and their building more), and they need bodies in those beds. It’s hard to ferret out the truth.
I recently had coffee with Erin. She represents a company by the name of Senior Care Authority of St. Louis. Erin’s company (and probably others) is constantly visiting facilities, asking the kinds of questions we should be asking but don’t even know to ask. Since it’s her job, she takes the time to do all of that stuff. And it does take a lot of time. Most of us have regular jobs, and our only free time is our evenings and weekends. I found a lot of times that no one is even available to answer my questions when I am available. A company like Erin’s can help with all of that.
Yes, growing old is tough. But we hope that we can find care and compassion at that time in our lives. It’s good to know who’s in the know about something as important as this.